Smuggity Smugface Fails at Words

Day three. My latest imaginary boyfriend is Mark Ronson – he gets on better with the imaginary cat.

But back to “Day three”…

I went to bed pretty smug last night. Not just smug, actually: Smuggity. I was Smuggity as hell. Neil Gaiman-esque.

I’d had a good session (of writing, don’t be filthy) in the evening and felt like I’d cruised to my word count without problems, having written in some good interaction between my characters, solid dialogue, plodding-but-actual tension building towards a definite scene climax and revearsal. I keep calling it the ‘Wronski Feint’, but I think that’s actually something from Harry Potter. You know, like in Quidditch… *Ahem* AS IF I know about Quidditch tactics. What do you think I am, some kind of loser? Oh. Hang on…

Anyway, even though I keep calling it by the wrong(ski) name I *am* actually thinking of a real thing. I think. I’m thinking of a term Mark Gatiss used in A History of Horror to describe a particular kind of tension release and revearsal of expectations in horror movies (used by and named after some director or other). An example of the kind of situation it describes is, say, where a woman is walking down a dark alley and hears footsteps coming after her; she quickens her pace; the footsteps also quicken; she breaks into a run; suddenly there’s a hand on her shoulder (moment of maximum tension) BUT in a revearsal of expecations (is it the monster/murderer?) it is revealed that it’s just the friend she’s on her way to meet. That kind of thing.

I’m getting carried away. The point was supposed to be that I’d done a day’s-worth of good writing, felt highly pleased with myself, greased my moustache (I don’t have one but if I did it would be like Dali’s), and did a lot of “faw faw-ing” before going to bed a confirmed Smuggity.

Tonight, I write nothing (to do with my story). I’m not even properly procrastinating. I just have absolutely no plans whatsoever to write. And do you know why? BECAUSE I DID WELL YESTERDAY AND TO CONTINUE TODAY WOULD BE TO INVITE FAILURE! Deep, right? Like, totally.

What I want to know is this: who the hell invited my inner bloody editor to take part in this project? I thought I’d sent the snarky bitch off on holiday for a month; why the hell is she back so soon?

Let’s do a count: 1700 tonight + 1700 that I’ll fail to write tomorrow night because of  bonfirenightbrilliance + 1700 on hangoversaturday = 6800 words on Sunday.

Probs well easy, that. Right? Right guys?



Go Go Gadget NanoTechnology

No, seriously, see what I did there? It’s hilarious. I used the expression ‘NANOTECHNOLOGY’ to mean ‘technology for NaNoWriMo’ rather than the more generally recognised ‘technology wot is, like, *well* small, innit’. I’m a blinkin’ (heavily sarcastic and rather drunk at this point) genius. Or not a genius: APPAZZA, according to Wikipedia, Nanotechnology “is the study of the controlling of matter on an atomic and molecular scale”. Yeah sure. Whatevs.

Anyway, look. There’s bloody loads of brilliant-sounding (although largely untested my me, so I can’t really comment on its actual brilliance) writery technology out there. Here are two music-based technologies that I’m all excited about at the moment. I’d explain them but, you know, I’ve got wine to drink an’ that:

Fave music stuff
SPOTIFY – Like borrowing someone elses music collection, but in an excellent way. Download it, type in what you want to listen to, and there you have it! You can – almost unbeliveably – create playlists etc using even the free version. Even the annoying adverts (which you don’t get if you cough up and pay for the Premium subscription) don’t spoil it…
Last FM – Music radio online. Type in a song or artist you like, and Last FM will use this to find tracks that are musically similar. Brilliant. Free. Win.

Tonight I’m listening to Gomez, Fleet Foxes, Temper Trap, and the brilliant song that my imaginary boyfriend Joseph Gordon-Levitt dances to in 500 Days of Summer, You Make My Dreams. Speaking of Joseph Gordon-Levitt, if you like aforementioned man, or love good film shorts with quirky visuals and scripts, then I DEMAND that you watch Morgan M. Morganson’s Date With Destiny immediately. When not swooning over my imaginary boyfriend I’ve been browsing the TV Tropes website on the advice of a fellow NaNo-er (be warned: it’s highly addictive and is going to be one hell of a procrastination tool when it all kicks off) and checking out a whole host of…

Story writing software

Storybox – I didn’t really like the way this looked so deleted it almost immediately. I’m shallow like that.
Storybook – Better looking than Storybox but still a bit fiddly for the stage I’m at now… maybe later. – A nifty on line corkboard that’s simple to look at and just as simple to use. First impressions are pretty good. – THIS IS A GLORIOUS INVENTION! Online mind-mapping, simple to work, beautiful to behold, free to use. You can test it out without signing up and I IMPLORE you to do so immediately. Thank you to NaNoWriMo’s EvilBenFranklin for bringing this into my life.

More technologies to come later, when I’m less likely to fall off my chair asleep.